Daybook

Giving thanks for - emotional sobriety.

Outside my window - A storm is brewing. I hear the thunder and and see the dark clouds moving our way from the west. The past few days have been very gloomy which always affects my mood. It’s not snowing though so there is some good news.

Clothing myself in - comfy long pants, a t-shirt and a too-big-for-me sweater of my husband’s. It was handy to grab on my way down the stairs where I knew I would need the extra layer for warmth. When I put it on I felt a warm fuzzy knowing a little piece of my him would be keeping me warm while at work and play.

Home front - Spring is around the corner and there is an unofficial list of things-to-do growing exponentially in my brain. This list will truly never end, all the things will never be done, and that’s okay. Progress not perfection. I can tell you one that has to be done sooner rather than later - the peach trees need a ruthless pruning.

On the menu - I didn’t complete a menu for the week yet, but it’s on the list of things to do today. I plan to work with what is already in the freezer before buying more meat. Our tastes are definitely changing and that means the list of meals from which to plan is narrowing.

Pondering - how I am brought back home to myself so often by the struggles I encounter in daily life. If I am restless, irritable or discontent, I know I’m not working in my own ‘gifting’. I can’t function at full capacity if my energy is clogged, and that’s pretty much what it feels like when I veer off the path.

"As I fill you with My love, you become a reservoir of love, overflowing into the lives of other people."

 

Jesus Calling March 17

Listening - I started listening to a podcast interview on recovery which I hope to finish later today. I also started but didn’t finish The Next Right Thing this morning. It’s a longer episode than usual so it didn’t quite fit in the 20 minute drive to pick up my grandchildren in the morning. Listening to some new music that my daughter shares with me. I’m glad we tend to really enjoy the same music.

Reading - Every time I think I’ll start a book in the evenings while the television is on, I get caught up in whatever is on and never get to the reading. Honestly, I’m not sure I can stay awake in the evenings long enough to read, especially this week since I am on medication to address the painful muscle spasms in my back.

Watching - Outlander, again. No complaints about this one. I really do enjoy this series and look forward to new seasons.

Making - I have stacks of things waiting to be “made”. Sewing mostly. I actually am looking forward to working with fabric and creating a variety of items. The quilting machine is assembled and ready to go. Now we’re just working on all the other things, mostly batting right now.

Loving the moments - that I am breathing LOL. Seriously, right now I’m just thankful for life and new mercies every day. When the pendulum swings into the darker side of things, I know it will be okay - that it will pass and there will be brighter days ahead. Still, I prefer the sunnier days, but don’t we all?

Planning for the week ahead - unlike last week, this week started out with very little scheduled. I’m so glad, because I would have had to rearrange some things. Driving is particularly hard on my back during these episodes. All that is left is a hair appointment for mom and Mastermind on Friday. I certainly hope healing progresses and I am able to do both.

Naming what matters - Boy is this relevant today. Naming what matters is often made easier by being able to name what DOESN’T matter. The process of elimination might be an altogether overlooked tool for naming what does matter. In this season of trying to figure out who I am and what I really want to do with my time and energy, naming what matters and what doesn’t has become incredibly important. I hope to share more about that later…

Words worth sharing - from The Artists Way chapter 11: “If you are happier writing than not writing, painting than not painting, singing than not singing, acting than not acting, directing than not directing, for God’s sake (and I mean that literally) let yourself do it.” I am learning that writing really does not have to result in publishing or fame or followers to be meaningful and worthwhile. It will remain my playground and I will be happy here.

Something to remember - we had a very small baby sprinkle for Mandie this past Saturday. It was just mom, the four sisters and me - this was her request. We wanted to make it special so we decorated and had some games to play. Mostly it was just time to be together, something we are not getting nearly enough of these days. In the midst of preparation while standing in the kitchen chatting with Christina and Rachel, I felt that familiar zing - the one that tells me my back is done for the day, maybe the week or the month. I had no choice but to obey them when all the family told me to sit while they completed the preparations. I couldn’t have finished on my own if I'd tried. They did an incredible job - it was truly lovely and we had a wonderful time. Mandie was pleasantly surprised. At the end of the night, Rachel finished all the cleanup to include returning items to their storage spaces. It was such a blessing to wake up to a clean house and kitchen. I want to remember how they stepped up and helped, how nice it was to spend that time together celebrating the impending arrival of our newest granddaughter, that simplicity can be lovely, and for us, smaller is better. Oh, and I have been told to remember the slider recipe :-)