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My kindred spirit and meL

I was chatting (for a very long time) with my friend yesterday. We can talk and talk and talk and still have things to share when we part after a 5 1/2 hour chat. It was a very, very good day. We miss each other when we go so long between visit. Interestingly, it hadn’t really been that long since we got together for our last chat, it just seemed like it was too long. We really do need each other.

We can talk about so many different things, because both of us have the pin-ball machine game going on in our brains. We have a lot of different things that consume our energy, time, effort, and brain space. We dabble, it a lot of things. Our brains scatter in different directions like cockroaches when the lights are unexpectedly turned on LOL Maybe that’s a really bad metaphor to use, but then again maybe not. Cockroaches will be the creatures that survive a nuclear event - our ideas probably are like that. They will follow us to the grave. Our bodies will die, our energy will be gone, but we will still be dreaming about the things we think we’d really like to do.

She’s a bit younger than me, but she also copes with MS and a plethora of other health issues. Other people who have experienced the same challenges she has and does would probably just give up. They would sit around and allow life to happen around them and use their illness as an excuse. She does not. She never has. I can’t imagine that she ever would. She has learned her limits, and she doesn’t like being looked at like a fragile china doll. Yes, she wants her family to acknowledge that she does have limits and that there are times when she will need more help and understanding during periods of relapse or exacerbation, but she does not want them looking at her illness, and looking right past her. When she is well and has energy to use, she wants to use it with gusto. Spoons, when she’s got them, she wants to play them. LOL

We have both been going through a bit of a stormy season the last couple months, not the same type of storms, but we usually are able to see the similarities in the challenges. Life is just hard. It’s also wonderful, and a gift that we can choose to appreciate or whine about not having more (time, energy, money, support...) . It’s easy to fall into that habit, we usually can pull each other back from that precipice. Occasionally we happen to be experiencing the storms together rather than in shifts, and when that happens it might take us a little longer to pull out of it because we are like one gal hanging over the edge trying to pull the other just a little more above us on the edge, again and again until at last one of us makes it to the top on solid ground and pulls the other up to safety. It’s crazy and it’s a gift. To have a friend that understands you, knows you and still loves you. Really loves you.

We happen to be on the topic of how we always want to do so much, but when it comes right down to it, we often don’t have the time, energy or resources to follow through or complete it, or we lose interest and move on to the next bright idea we have because we cannot shut our brains down. There are just so many things we think about, things we want to do, learn, share, experience... it’s like a hurricane in our brains. Hurricane season. You would have thought we’d just discovered a breakthrough cure for something. Hurricane Season. Yeah, we so often describe life situations and circumstances as seasons. I’ve always just thought about it in terms of you know, like Spring when you are very young, fresh and tender; Summer when you are in the young prime, starting life as an independent adult with their bright future standing right in front of them; Fall as the season when you’ve experienced a good part of life and maybe have some good lessons under your belt and maybe are traveling along pretty smoothly, or not. It could be a rough Fall and everything is changing drastically but eventually (if we're lucky!) we all hit Winter.  Some people love winter, and some just don’t. It’s all about perspective and attitude. Well, I guess you could say that about all the seasons, but when you’re in the Spring time season of life you don’t really know about the other seasons so there’s nothing to compare it to. But when you hit winter, you’ve seen them all, and probably have formed some opinion and preferences about your best season. Come to think of it, wouldn’t the “golden years” actually be the Fall? You know, when you understand that winter is right around the corner and whether or not you’re looking forward to it, you really just want to embrace and enjoy every single minute of the beauty and mildness of the season after the long, active summer and before the cold, dreary winter? Just thinking with my fingers here...

Anyway, there are other seasons. Planting season, rainy season, dry season, harvest season, tornado season, hurricane season. Yes, I think if we are going to describe life as seasons, we really ought to include these seasons as well, because it would be nice to know in advance if you need to be prepared for all kinds of shit to come at you like a hurricane.

There is much to be pondered and written about the idea of "life seasons" beyond those we typically consider. Let me think on it, and maybe I'll come back with some thoughts.

Peace (and may the weather be fair in whatever season you currently find yourself)

Susan

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